October 10th Replenishment Strategy.

Chris is away now till Monday lunch time....so I have some time to blog and spend time working out where to go from here. You may have sensed that I have fallen down and some of you may well have actually seen it.!! No I don't mean actually physically falling but witnessed the tears falling in public places. Anne/Iris..I hope you know the fact I ran out of Morrisons instead of sitting and having a coffee with you guys was NOTHING to do with you.The lack of tea bag in the teapot was the last straw for me after a really bad 2-3 days so the tears had to fall....and I just couldnt cope with the idea of having a meltdown in Morrisons..altho that sounds like a song title.!!

I have done some serious thinking and praying this last 48 hours and realise I need a "Replenishment Strategy". If you were at the Willow Creek conference you may have heard Bill Hybels talk about how he was so close to burn out that he felt the Holy Spirit whisper to him " Bill ...I am a little worried about you " and at that moment Bill admitted he too was little worried about himself.

So I guess I have also reached a point where I am a "little worried about me " and I have some serious choices to make to ensure I don't fall down so hard I may never get up again. Bill talks about how as leaders ..(altho this will apply to all of us ) we need to have a full bucket..we cant carry on serving and leading and planning etc without finding our buckets getting empty and that we need to have a replenishment strategy in place . He talked about what he had done to ensure he was getting the God/work/family/personal balance right in his life.

As I have pondered this and looked at where /how/why... ..my bucket was emptying out I found that I had slipped back into old habits and failed to keep myself accountable. With the summer months and all routine going out the window and having the blessings of three holidays in a very short space of time my spiritual routines had virtually gone and we all know what happens when this occurs.At the beginning of the year and this blog I had made some firm boundaries eg.. not reading so many fiction books ( which is I might add my favourite thing to do..reading )and over the summer and on holiday etc I found I had begun again to read my favourite crime novels. Nothing wrong in that..I don't feel this is a bad thing but at the expense of reading Gods word I had once again allowed it to get out out of balance.Over a decade ago JWG gave me a word that "I should be wary of what I put before my eyes" and God brings me back to this time and time again

Bill Hybels talks about "we all need to exercise self leadership " and I had failed to exercise this ...and for the sake of space I will say that this has happened in many areas..not just reading.!! hence all the weight I have gained in last 4 months.

Bill talks about our ministry and what we are doing to serve God.....
he says this
"Is the pace that I am doing the work of God destroying the work of God in me ?"
This really needed some serious thinking....and once again I realised that I had been serving and serving and serving and the replenishment wasn't happening.When I picked up the bible notes that I use ...the July 10th entry ...(yes.. I am that far behind.!!)..talks about the "prayer of exhaustion" and how Moses is pouring out his heart to God..Numbers ch 11 and Moses is just throwing out all these questions to God...Why? ..What?.. Did I ?.. Where?...and then Moses adds "because this burden is too heavy for me " and once more I understood that I cant run alone in whatever sphere I serve God. If I apply this to the car parking ministry then in the same way God raised up 70 elders to work alongside Moses at this time ..I also need to be looking for people to run with me and help me serve to the best of my abilities...I am not actually saying I need or want 70 elders to do car parking with me.!!but I am saying ..I need solid and consistent support.

So...what have I decided ...

1)to change to The Message bible for the moment...I have been doing the "through the bible in a year" but for some reason decided to use the reading plan in the Chronological version..this has meant that since I started I have been wading through The Old Testament which is great for getting it fixed in your mind for when it all actually happened but very depressing in places.Plus I have never really got into The Message version and sometimes a completely new thing helps to inspire new ways of thinking.
2)leaving my fiction novels upstairs again so I am not picking them up at odd moments during the day...this does also serve to encourage me to go to bed earlier than I have been as I then get to read in bed.
3)Bill Hybels encourages us all to read GOOD books...Good Christian books ...and I have collected a fair few but never really got into them so will be choosing and starting this.
4)Being careful who I hang out with...as Simon says .."who is taking you up in the lift and who is taking you down"
5)Saying YES every time God asks me to do something
6)Not feeling guilty about saying NO to requests that will empty me for the wrong reasons.
7)Keep short accounts..both with forgiveness and repentance.
8)Bill Hybels encourage us to "stop moaning about the lack of resources and get on and be thankful for what we do have "...so I am planning on bringing that into every area of my life..not just ministry wise.

Finally... Bill talks about the "rogue wave" and about how we all can serve and follow and live when the seas are calm but every now and then the sea throws up an unexpectedly "rogue wave"...and we can be overwhelmed in many ways as we try to steer our boat through rougher and more dangerous seas. If we are confident in our replenishment strategy then we can easily and quickly ride the wave through to safe harbour...but when we are empty then we are often in danger of capsizing. I guess I have been standing on the deck of a leaky boat and the "rogue wave" hit me...but I am not going to let it capsize me.

My prayer for you as you read this that you will heed the voice of Gods Holy Spirit IF he is whispering to you..."I am a little worried about you " and that you take some time and look at where you need to replenish yourself too.

Finally..as I picked up The Message translation yesterday I heard God say Psalm 17...so let me leave you with these words.

"I am staying on your trail...I am putting one foot in front of the other and I am not giving up "