Shadow Of Victory

Saturday 17 November 2012

Grannys Gap Year (8) on being ill

Well....it seems as if I have been ill / poorly one way or another since my adventure started in Academy. First it was the faint then the bruised lungs and fractured rib then the wrong dosage of meds and light headedness and then of course cystitis creeping in twice !! Oh and now its gastric flu !!

I have had emails and texts and Face Book comments ( thank you )  with all sorts of encouragement and support and loads of advice which have kept me going. The advice has ranged from praying in the spirit to drinking green tea and in between those two I have been told its probably demonic in origin and also that I need to take care of the temple of the Holy Spirit more . The encouragements have ranged from gorgeous flowers to lovely visits from friends bearing nothing other than a smile and a hug. The support has been never ending from the hubster and Elisha's mummy who have taken time off to help me out. The amazing Matt  who loves me no matter if we are out and about or if I am laid up on sofa and he got his keyboard or radio he just goes with the flow.

I don't mind being ill....if I am honest;Apart from the boring bits and the actual discomfort of being sick and spending ages on the loo and only being able to drink small cups of tomato soup ( my poo is pink now  ) What I absolutely HATE about being ill is both missing out on things and letting people down. This is what really pulls me down over and over again and why I detest being poorly whether it is a tummy upset a migraine or a rib fracture .

So far this last 3 months I have not been able to take part fully in Academy Facility times and in fact have only managed it twice so seeing the others working away when I couldn't has been really hard for me to adjust to. I have missed several Thursdays teaching sessions which is really yuck as its hard to catch up with other peoples notes, I have missed the Advance Children's Conference today which Kerith is hosting so I am once more missing a chance to serve with the Academy team as well as see/hear inspirational speakers and I have also made decision not to go to Konstruction Krew tomorrow as I have been out twice in last 2 days for no more than 2 hours and then had to lay down to recover . Tomato soup really isn't enough fuel to keep you going for more than a couple of hours.

This last "missed" is a particularly distressing decision for me me in that I have been helping a young 9 year old to settle in KK...I have managed to get him to be my "helper" a couple of times but then he throws another wee wobbly and we have to start again and each week I see him and we are building a good relationship. I made a promise to him last Sunday that I would ring him in the week to have a chat and we did have a really good old chin wag on Wednesday evening and we said
."see you Sunday " but having made decision today not to go in I felt I needed to ring him and tell him why rather than leave it for him to wonder why I had broken a promise. This more than anything is what I hate hate hate about being ill .

We did have a wee chat and he sounded okay and I chatted to his mum and have let KK leader know so I am praying this isn't a set back for JB...he is such a gorgeous wee lad and full of beans and life and chatter when he settles he is a pleasure to have around so even though I wont be there tomorrow at 11am I will be praying for him ,

With regards to recovery I have also made a couple of other decisions which I haven't wanted to make but just know I need to be sensible. Based on how last two days have gone. As well as not going to KK for tomorrows meetings I have also cancelled my trip to visit my precious Dorset Friend on Monday. Those of you who know who I am talking about will know just how hard that decision has been. I am also not planning on serving in Academy Tuesday either to give me another 3- 4 days for full recovery as well as trying to get beyond the Tomato soup stage no matter how much I love Mr Heinz it doesn't give me much energy.

As to why I have been ill so much in last three months I have no real bias and don't fully subscribe to "you are stepping out for Jesus and the enemy will be against you " I just know that illness is all part of the fallen world and the simple fact is gastric flu is going round . Loads of people have told me that they know others who have been so much worse than me with same flu symptoms. I kinda like to think that I am just one of the statistics that get poorly all at one time rather than being a specific target for the enemy to aim at. Having stated that I am praying daily for healing and protection and asking God to keep me safe and well at all times from the enemy but I do that fairly frequently anyway whether well or ill ....for me and all my friends and family its a regular discussion I have with the Almighty.

I just need to keep my slightly inward poor old me self looking upwards to God and believing that even in this time of illness I am still living in his purpose and still in the right place . Academy Team I salute you all and miss you all so much when I don't get to hang out with you .

1 comment:

Ruthie said...

Love you Mrs M :0)

Been much the same although I can say I'm now back to 97% full health but flippin' tired as I try to catch up.

Get better soon dear friend and 'enjoy' the time to rest. xxx